So first I need to say that once again my technology has failed me. I am currently, here and now, using my very old back up laptop to try to get through this here review. You might be wondering what would drive a man of my patience and attention to cool, to suffer the wrath of a busted key board and hyperactive mousepad... thereby resulting in my rage and near endless profanity... well CARRIE did. I say it, and well, I need to get this down, and out my head...
I say way, way, way, way back in tha day... an Author by the name of Stephen King published his first book. A wicked little burn through in a couple of nights thriller, that had the world talking and launched one of the most prolific careers of our literary lifetime. Then someone green lit the film, hired the legendary - Brian De Palma, to direct, and BAM! Fast as you can say Hobgoblinator, we had a film hit.
The story is, and has been, and is still for this here remake... A young girl. Raised beneath the thumb, and religious insanity, of her Mother. Suffers through tortures at her school. Only to have someone reach out, and offer her a chance for a normal, young girl moment - At prom. While this is going on Carrie starts to realize that she's not like other girls... she can move things with her mind... and well, then a bitch drops a bucket of blood on her... and well, people die and stuff.
Ok, I need to say something. Deep breath. I read a few reviews for this film, and I gotta say, wow people were hating on this here little bit of en-ter-tain-ment. People saying the plot was tweaked in horrible ways. That somehow the nearly undoubtable Julianne Moore had over acted as the mother. That the very talented Chloe Grace Moretz had taken a mistep... and blah, blah. The hate went on. Trusted reviewers, had me convinced this flick would be shite.
|I just... I don't understand why the Ketchup packs are so damn difficult. Everytime.|
So listen, really, was the original Stephen King Novel that awesome? I mean it was a short book. That was basically an F'd up teen slasher, with a wonderfully developed main character. and a cardboard supporting cast (I mean really, what was her mom other than messed up and Jesus loving?). Then a brilliant director, and an extremely awesome performance by Sissy Spacek turned the material into a classic. And one that does hold up well. But, as with every remake, there are Remake Haters (I shall now refer to them as - REHATERS tm) who rise up to claim the film as brilliant. As unremakable (man this review in a candy wonderland of sweet made up words...) as something that should not be touched.
You remember things like - OMG they are remaking EVIL DEAD. Nooooo the world will end! What's that they're remaking HALLOWEEN? Those heartless money grubbing hollywood bastards! Always after a buck. And hey, you know what those are two damn fine classics. But when people start rising up over a TOTAL RECALL remake, or ROBOCOP, well, I mean, when can we just admit maybe sometimes its okay to see what someone can do with the material decades later. And maybe, just maybe, some of those films aren't the Holy Grail of cinema we think...
Ok. I've ranted. Moving on.
I liked this film. First, the opening sequence was cool. And I liked how the blood rose up of the letters CARRIE. Yup. I just started at the damn title letters. How's that for awesome reviewer detail. The infamous shower scene where Carrie happened to have her period in the showers, and the other girls torture her... is very intense. And the addition of the girls taking pictures with their cells is very modern and approved touch. I liked bringing the Cyber bullying aspect in. Its a part of the modern Teen, and young adult experience. So I have no problem with it being brought in.
|Like I said, she needs some crazy eye lessons.|
Well Boony what about the two leads? A fine questions dear Booniacs, and you know, some of you won't agree, but I thought the Mother should always have been a little more over the top, and Julianne Moore has a blast here. Just going complete Johovaloco (man, I'm telling ya - call websters). Chloe Moretz as Carrie. Hmmmm. It was honestly a little strange seeing her as a more or less, normal, nice girl. I mean I am so used to her playing seriously adult teens (Hick, Let Me in, KickAss), here as a vunerable girl, different. But not in a bad way, just took me a bit to adjust. However, and I have to say it... they could have really uglied her up more. She is suppose to be all Patty Plain here, and she's really just normal Chloe in overalls, and no make up... There is just no way some boy wouldn't still step up and ask for her digits.
There are a few (a few more than a few) missteps here.
The major one that I have to bring up is the switch from Young girl terrified and tortured by her mom. Into all powerful teen that can move things and do what she wants... well the switch just comes too early. Some reviews have pointed out the issues they have with Carrie investigating her powers (Telekinesis) online. But I mean this is the information generation. I don't care if she has been chained to a cross in the jesus cave for her whole life... she would still know how to goggle. It's just she seems to move from Momma don't lock me in the closet to Momma I will pick you up and throw shit around . I do what I want really fast. I would have liked her Mom to bang her around a bit more... show how weak and afraid Carrie was even with her power.
Still. Chloe is inherently likable and she brings it to the character. Another thing that really bugged me... there are two moments where 1. It seems Carrie is also PyroKinetic and 2. Telepathic.... ? Um, when the hell did that happen. And really, the LameHollywoodMustHaveATwistEnding ending, was kaka. And... lastly... Carrie... did she really have to fly? Ever? No. The answer is no. The creepy, bloody walk, way better.
what about the Prom scene? I had alot of fun with it. I did. The opening and set up (in my twisted mind anyway) being a little bit of an upgrade. Though, as good an actress as Chloe G is, she coulda worked on her crazy eyes a bit more (Gotta give props to the original there - nobody crazy eyes like Sissy). Defs upped the violence, and gore. No problems there. Also, having her show a little more concern for her date, than herself... was a great touch, and defs sold her good girl pushed too far thang.
I don't want to spoil any thing here as is the way of BOONSWEET & BUCKLESWORTH, but there is an extension added to the ending, and I both liked and didn't like it. Having someone there to witness it was a great touch. But den... they go too far.
Listen. This movie has its flaws, and it's hardly a masterpiece. My point is the original was a one trick pony of a teen slasher than was elevated by a director and a lead, and though this one my now be able to claim that. It is still a lot of fun, and fully embraces what it is.
The effects were fun, and got a few look away moments out of the crowd.
Movie scale 3 out of 5 stars
Horror scale 3 out of 5 stars
Go in with a clean slate, and I think there in enough here to warrant 100 minutes of your life. Don't let the critics stop you. Its slasher fun. A little more classy with the talent involved, and you could argue more B than A movieness, but still... fun.
- Boonsweet is out this piece yo. My parting thought? So glad I do not ever have to go through high school again :)