A CADAVER CHRISTMAS (2011)
Well, my friends, the Christmas season is upon us once again. But, don't think for a minute that either Chuck Boonsweet or I are going to shut down for the holidays just yet (not until Christmas Eve at least). I am happy to be kicking off this month's Christmas-themed flicks, and I figured why not start with a movie from the over-saturated zombie sub-genre of horror. We'll begin the countdown to Christmas with A Cadaver Christmas. Have I said Christmas enough yet? Christmas.
The story is as follows: the Janitor (I capitalize the 'J' because that's all the janitor is referenced as, therefore it's his name as far as I'm concerned. I read somewhere his name is Chester, but I didn't catch it myself) of a University is doing his rounds late one night, when he is attacked from out of nowhere by a gang of undead. Fending them off as best he can, he escapes the university and winds up in a bar. Seeing the Janitor covered in blood, the bartender calls his cop buddy, Sam Sheriff (no I'm not kidding). After some funny banter between the Janitor and the only customer in the bar, Sheriff shows up. Outside, they all get attacked by more zombies. After killing them, Janitor gets his story out as best he can to Sheriff. So Sheriff, the bartender, the drunk, Janitor, and a perp who happened to be in Sheriff's car at the time, go to the university to investigate what's happening and why.
Ok, you need to understand something: this movie is not to be taken seriously. AT ALL. This is a 100% "shut your brain off and enjoy" kind of fun. Like for example, what real life situation would you find such a random bunch of people investigating anything like this. Don't answer, don't even think about it. You're not supposed to. Why did I think about it? Because I have a brain that's incredibly difficult to shut off when logic decided to check out of a flick.
Anyway, every character is quite enjoyable (except for maybe that perp I mentioned in Sheriff's car, you'll see why later in the flick. But he still has a few funny lines), especially Hanlon Smith-Dorsey, who played Tom the Drunk. He has some of the funniest lines I've heard in some time, mainly because of his delivery of said lines. The thing about this flick is it's really more of a comedy than horror, despite the name. There is more of a focus on the characters than the zombies and the gore, but don't worry, you'll see plenty of the latter sprinkled throughout. Daniel Rairdin-Hale was excellent as the Janitor, and a few other reviewers compared him in this to very early Bruce Campbell. For the most part, I'm having to agree with them, though Rairdin-Hale still adds his own touch to the character which makes it really shine. But hey, I know it seems like I singled out two characters as the best. However, as I said earlier, every character is very fun to watch, including Kristen the cute university security/police officer wannabe who joins up with the group around mid-flick.
Negatives? Not really. Again, as long as you shut your brain off, there won't be a problem. If I did have one issue, it was the Janitor's insistence of correcting the others if they call the undead anything other than 'cadavers'. Not so much the correcting in itself, but it happens so often that it got really old and a little distracting. However, it definitely wasn't a big enough problem to really detract from the overall performances.
So, in the end, I find A Cadaver Christmas to be very fun. The Christmas aspect is there, though not really shown until late in the movie. It has gore, zombies, comedy. There's even a couple of references to other movies in there, see if you can find them. Watch this, preferably around the holidays. In the meantime, Chuck and myself will have more holiday-themed reviews coming up, including our personal favorite Christmas movies. Stay tuned.
Movie Rating: 3.5 out of 5 stars
Christmas cheese rating: 4.5 out of 5 stars
- ON BOONSWEET, ON BUCKLESWORTH, ON DONNER AND BLITZEN