Friday, November 1, 2013

Plan A: Arnold and Sly - beat everyone up.

ESCAPE PLAN (2013)



How many really fun action films are there nowadays? I ain't talking superhero filled 300 million dollar budgets here... I'm talking good old fashioned bullets making swiss cheese outta the scenery. Not that many. Sure we get the FAST films, and the odd entry like Olympus has Fallen or Dredd but really, there is not that much out there. It would seem the movie companies are more than happy to risk hundreds of millions of dollars on new teen book to big screen. Oh and then they fail, and hollywood starts complaining about downloads and basically anything except it being their own damn fault for ignoring that 20-40 million dollar genre films continually bring in tonnes of coin... well... more often than not...

Well. Here you go. A grade B action adventure, with a very big plus - Arnold "The terminator" himself, and Sly Stallone. Two of the big three from the glory days in one picture... starring... finally. I mean too bad it came twenty years late... but whatevs... I'm alive, they're alive, all good I guess.

Your plot dear Booniacs... Sly plays Ray Breslin, who is a master escape artist. He is hired by the state to test their best prisons, and in escaping, show them the flaws. So someone has built a super prison and they wish to make sure it's as super as they think. They offer Ray some fat cash, and he agrees. Then, the next day he is grabbed off the street, and wakes up in this super prison. His safe word doesn't work, it looks like he was set up... and he will have to buddy up with ARNOLD! to break out, and defeat the evil warden.

Is it just me Jim, or is the service at this restaurant horrid... and creepy?

So lots of things blow up. Bad guys are bad. Tuff guys beat up tuff guys, and Jim "Don't call me Jesus" Caviezel, chews scenery as the evil warden. Do you need more? Are you not excited? Has your man (or woman) juice not started to warm and flow with greater speed? If not then this film is probably not for you.

However if you have ever cheered while watching Arnold mow down nameless drug dealers, and dirty cops... or lifted your arms in the air celebrating Stallone's triumph over mountain side terrorists. Then this here will have you smiling ear to ear.

First let me point out a few of the weaker points. One... plot. I mean, this guy just gets in the predicament way to stupid and easily. Hard to believe he's as uber smart as he is suppose to be. The man can figure out how to break out of a max jail with toilet paper and the plastic sheet off a milk carton, buuuuuuut when asked to be shipped to an unknown, secret, super prison, his answer... is - sure, kidnap me here.

Say what? Anyway. Moving on, Ray Breslin's super team of assistants (one of whom is 50 cent... ya... that guy. I guess Gangsta rap is dead so he's gotta do something) is pretty much useless. I'm not even sure why they are in the movie. I mean really... maybe to make it look like Breslin has a love life... and a friend... but they are useless. They lose Ray in like two minutes and spend the rest of the film trying to locate him... unsuccessfully.

Arnold - "Yes. Ok. We are both very sawy we took so damn long"


So to recap. Some plot holes, and a useless supporting cast... Although Sam Neill as the conflicted doctor was a nice touch. Though, he really didn't have any sort of back story to explain his all goody goody in a sea of bad guys thing. I mean, I think they could pick a decent heartless doctor for their facility.

Other than that, we are green light go for good times. One of the coolest parts of the film is a strong Muslim character. With a strong faith. That's right; after years of slaughtering endless parades of middle eastern, and such peeps, in the name of defending america... they decide to include a 3 dimensional and heroic Muslim in their film. I thought it was very cool. A welcomed touch if you will.

The action is a blast, the one liners are great, and Stallone and Arnold have a blast working together. It really makes you sad these folks didn't get together sooner. But then I guess there was enough action pie to go around. Unlike nowadays when it seems you gotta pack two, three, 4 stars in to draw the crowds. But thats the price for blasting the paying public with sub par action flicks... Transporter 2 and 3 anyone?

This (much like Arnold's LAST STAND) is a great time. I actually saw this one with quite the diverse group and they had a blast with it. Blood flying, lots of bass boosted punches thrown... and a really fun, buddy action flick. With a little mystery, and some fun "Oh no will they get caught" moments.

As far as action goes... you won't find much to hate here. Yes they are getting old, but they both have a ton of charisma. It really makes me excited for this here next Rambo I keep hearing about.

Stay strong Booniacs! The mindless action flick lives!

movie scale 3 out of 5 stars
Action movie scale 3.5 out of 5 stars

This flick was originally gunna be called THE TOMB after watching the flick... think I kinda liked the original title. Just my two and a half cents....

Later Punks

-CBB

3 comments:

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Chris Widdop said...

Nice review, definitely had a lot of fun with this one. Great seeing these two work together in something more than a brief cameo. :)

Chuck Boonsweet said...

Ya. Even though it took too damn long it was definitely worth the wait. Pretty pumped to see expendables 3 and this here new Rambo movie/TV show I keep hearing about.