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I mean how great is that freaking poster?
Take a moment and let it sink in. That is one primed for violence redneck and his pet Croc tearing through the backwoods waters, of some back woods town...
Q: Boony, is that a scythe?
A: Why yes dear booniac it is... it so is.
And what do you think he's going to do with that? Yup. He's gonna kill folks, and then feed them to his Croc. Not always in that order.
So as I admitted I am on a bit of an old school kick, and my 80s insanity has stretched back into the 70s now and it is getting weird folks. Tobe Hooper is something of an enigma in the horror-verse. He created The Texas Chainsaw Massacre a legit horror icon, perhaps top three all time. Then he slides another couple legit offerings under his directing belt, Salem's Lot, and another horror icon (being of the PG-13 variety) in Poltergeist, the insanity that is Lifeforce and well... not much else really. But he has managed to crank out some B-movie cheese that has led to bluray re-releases, and a steady love from a certain portion of the Horror crowd.
Eaten alive came a few years after Texas Chainsaw and for me; is the closest he ever came to recapturing the glorious bloody fury of his Apex. Somehow, is still one of his lesser known/appreciated efforts. I pretty much covered the plot at the start, but to add a few details... there is a missing girl, who was a hooker, and then decided not to be, and ended up at JUDD's hotel, and then got eaten... her Dad and sister are crossing the countryside looking for her. Robert Englund shows up to be a dick, and try to have sex with women in door number 2... and um, some married couple that makes your worst relationship look like a paperback romance makes an appearance to go crazy and set up the child under the house bit that plays through a large portion of the film...
In this order... new person arrives... hears child screaming for help under the house... and then they die...
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| Okay (deep breath)...you can do this, just wiggle your big toe... |
Basically this film isssssss whack. And great. And weird. And crazy, and well, pretty much everything the TCM was without the gasoline. There is almost so much crazy here it's hard to be drawn in at some points. Luckily Robby Englund is always a good watch, there are many nubile females in peril, and the Croc action is a hoot. Neville Brand absolutely lets loose as Judd. Talking to himself, laughing hysterically in excitement as people get eaten... whore hating... and well, all that.
I recommend this film only for the true slasher/gore/Hooper lovers out there. Then first hour plus of this film will be hard to get through for most, besides the villain there really isn't a lot going on here. The girl under the house is interesting for a bit then its just "How are you still alive"... but... the last 15 minutes really turns this film around. Naked. Blood. And some genuine peril. Much like the assault to the senses that is the ending to the original Texas Chainsaw Hooper goes all out, it really had my attention for the last act...
Considering some of the slashers I have um, suffered through as of late... this was defs on the not worst list...
Movie scale 2.5 out of 5 stars
Horror/B-movie scale 3.5 out of 5 stars
Ok.
Screw it... I have too...
In a while, Crocodile(s)....
Side note, talk about trying to recapture the glory days... Tobe Hooper not only remade his Toolbox Murders in 2004, he also did another low budget Croc movie in 2000 called Crocodile... nothing wrong with being consistent I guess... :)
this review brought to you by -
Charles "I will never stay at a backwoods hotel" Boonsweet
me @tallwhitefox
my Partner @KenBucklesworth
and us @BoonsBuckles
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